With Keanu Reeves wrapping his last day of filming in Buffalo, I think it’s a fitting time to point out what a great way this is to end the year for everyone in Buffalo. Although he wasn’t here very long, he did make several trips to visit and had nothing but good things to say about the city, and even better, the community. The people of the city were what he said impressed him most and his usually stone face was lit with excitement as he told reporters about the movie. It’s nice to see someone excited to be here for once, and then actually follow through. Hopefully this movie makes Buffalo out to be the gem we all know it can be, rather than an embarrassment. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see, until then, I know we’re all grateful it was filmed here in the first place. Not only did it give jobs to locals at what could be a very stressful time of year, but it gave even more holiday spirit to those who got to feel the thrill of catching a glimpse of a star, or maybe even being an extra.
I’ll admit, I had no idea what this movie was about when it first came here. After some digging, this is what the NYTimes movie reviews said:
“Henry, a toll booth worker, is unknowingly roped into a bank robbery by acquaintances, and when the police show up, Henry is the only one who gets caught. During a four-year jail stint, he befriends Max, a wise, older gentleman, who leads Henry to consider his purpose in life. Upon his release, Henry returns to the bank he didn't rob, and realizes he went to jail for a crime he didn't commit. So, he might as well go ahead and commit the crime. ~ Baseline StudioSystems”
Other sites have called it a romantic, but darkly twisted comedy, which everyone loves. I can’t wait to see if Reeves did our city justice and captured everything about us that we love. Maybe it will open the doors to Buffalo being considered more often?
Friday, December 18, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
Bike-by, you say? It's the hottest thing since the drive-by.
I'm back, finally. Sorry for the disappearing act, school demanded all of my time for a bit but now I'm back and ready to catch up on all the wonder that is Buffalo, starting with something I recently read in the news...
Is anyone besides me deeply disturbed by the rise of "bike-by" shootings? Yes, by "rise" I mean I've read about two incidents in the last 8ish months, but that's just a minor detail. Up until the first one, I had no idea this even existed. I don't think that makes me overly sheltered, in fact, I'm sure a lot of you are wondering what I'm talking about. What we're dealing with is one of two possible scenarios (in my opinion) and both are as absurd as the act itself.
Scenario #1: "Half-Baked Gets 'Er Done"
In this situation, our Buffalo gang members (here, nicknamed "Half-Baked") and criminals are so bad at their "jobs" that they are incapable of either stealing a car or straight out buying one with their drug money, thus leaving them unable to commit an actual drive-by shooting. I guess it has to be considered that they did manage to get guns somehow, so they did exert some effort. C- for effort, Half-Baked. Now it is entirely possible that someone's mother took the car without telling aforementioned thug, thus leaving him in quite the pickle. Don't worry folks, that won't stop him; he's focused on the bigger picture- somebody needs to get shot, one way or another. Half-Baked is forced to improvise- run? Risky, he could stumble over an untied shoelace or a crack in the sidewalk. Ah-ha! Half-Baked's little brother, Half-Baked II, has left his Huffy unattended in the front yard. Problem solved, my friends. Just take a minute to picture this- a grown man rolling down the street, ready to attack with a gun in his basket. It's horrific, but hysterical, especially because he got away! That's right, whoever committed this recent "bike-by" got away, on his bicycle, in broad daylight. Both times.
This brings us to Scenario #2: Real- life Possibility.
In this scenario, the picture I'm painting is slightly more horrific and not quite as funny. This situation is one where there are now children, not even old enough to drive, shooting rival gang members as the go by on their bikes, no one suspecting them because they’re just kids. I know that this unfortunate idea is the more likely reality because it seems like every week there’s a new story about teens shooting other teens.
Faced with these situations, you can either let yourself drown in the sad reality that Buffalo gangs have come to include children, or you can take a step back and accept it for what it is, life. And if you can’t laugh at the absurdity of life, then I’m sorry for you because that’s part of living. Is shooting people funny? Of course not, unless it’s you shooting yourself in the leg Plexico, then we’re all going to laugh openly at you. But it is an absurd situation we’re faced with, there’s no denying that, and if you look at it how I do, you can find the humor in it. Besides, since the shooter got away, no one can actually prove it wasn’t Scenario #1.
Is anyone besides me deeply disturbed by the rise of "bike-by" shootings? Yes, by "rise" I mean I've read about two incidents in the last 8ish months, but that's just a minor detail. Up until the first one, I had no idea this even existed. I don't think that makes me overly sheltered, in fact, I'm sure a lot of you are wondering what I'm talking about. What we're dealing with is one of two possible scenarios (in my opinion) and both are as absurd as the act itself.
Scenario #1: "Half-Baked Gets 'Er Done"
In this situation, our Buffalo gang members (here, nicknamed "Half-Baked") and criminals are so bad at their "jobs" that they are incapable of either stealing a car or straight out buying one with their drug money, thus leaving them unable to commit an actual drive-by shooting. I guess it has to be considered that they did manage to get guns somehow, so they did exert some effort. C- for effort, Half-Baked. Now it is entirely possible that someone's mother took the car without telling aforementioned thug, thus leaving him in quite the pickle. Don't worry folks, that won't stop him; he's focused on the bigger picture- somebody needs to get shot, one way or another. Half-Baked is forced to improvise- run? Risky, he could stumble over an untied shoelace or a crack in the sidewalk. Ah-ha! Half-Baked's little brother, Half-Baked II, has left his Huffy unattended in the front yard. Problem solved, my friends. Just take a minute to picture this- a grown man rolling down the street, ready to attack with a gun in his basket. It's horrific, but hysterical, especially because he got away! That's right, whoever committed this recent "bike-by" got away, on his bicycle, in broad daylight. Both times.
This brings us to Scenario #2: Real- life Possibility.
In this scenario, the picture I'm painting is slightly more horrific and not quite as funny. This situation is one where there are now children, not even old enough to drive, shooting rival gang members as the go by on their bikes, no one suspecting them because they’re just kids. I know that this unfortunate idea is the more likely reality because it seems like every week there’s a new story about teens shooting other teens.
Faced with these situations, you can either let yourself drown in the sad reality that Buffalo gangs have come to include children, or you can take a step back and accept it for what it is, life. And if you can’t laugh at the absurdity of life, then I’m sorry for you because that’s part of living. Is shooting people funny? Of course not, unless it’s you shooting yourself in the leg Plexico, then we’re all going to laugh openly at you. But it is an absurd situation we’re faced with, there’s no denying that, and if you look at it how I do, you can find the humor in it. Besides, since the shooter got away, no one can actually prove it wasn’t Scenario #1.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Welcome to the ice, your Buffalo Sabres!
Boys and girls, please turn your attention to the Buffalo Sabres. They fight hard, they rally for their fans, and since they play 82 games every season, a bitter loss once and awhile isn’t quite so hard to take. Whenever the Bills fail to impress their loyal following, the Sabres seem to pick up the slack and try that much harder to give their city something to celebrate. Sure, they just lost two games in a row, but they also have one of the best goalies in the league and let our AHL goalie get a shot at the big time. That’s a coach who genuinely cares not just about the stats, but about his players. Where else in the NHL would a coach let an inexperienced minor league goalie start (and finish) against one of their biggest rivals? But that’s the great thing about Buffalo. Winning is without a doubt important to Lindy Ruff and his aspiring team, but they never lose sight of the fact that they’re all lucky enough to be playing a sport that millions of kids grow up playing.
Every NHL player, in some way, gets to stay a kid forever. Where some people have to get up every day and sit behind a desk, these lucky few have a gift that allows them to make millions of dollars playing a game. A game. It’s not even called a job, fans don’t go watch the Sabres work against the Maple Leafs. We go see them play. You don’t go root for your financial advisor, you root for Paul Gaustad every time you watch his fist connect with an opponent, and as they fall to the ice, you jump out of your seat. The excitement, the electricity, that flows through HSBC Arena every time the Buffalo Sabres step on the ice is a phenomenon that cannot be explained in words, but every person reading this who has ever been a part of a Sabres win, whether at home or at the arena, knows the feeling I’m talking about. There is nothing quite like being one of 18,690 people, all there for one reason, and all united in their common love for hockey.
In what other city could a team sell out 49 straight games without winning the Stanley Cup? It happened here. In fact, it’s completely acceptable to us that the team hasn’t brought home a Stanley Cup yet, and last season we really didn’t play as well as we could have. But other than last season, our team has landed in the playoffs every season since the lockout, and that’s something our city can, and will, brag about.
There’s nothing quite like a Sabres fan. No one judges you for jumping on the bandwagon when we went to the playoffs, no one cares if you sit in the 300s or in a box, and it doesn’t matter what town you’ll head home to after the game. For 2 ½ hours every person in that building is equal and when Connolly nudges that overtime goal past Emery's skate, the closest person to you becomes your best friend, whether you know each other or not. You may leave never knowing your neighbor’s name, but you’ll know the way it feels to be hugged by a stranger because, my friends, there isn’t a Sabres fan around that hasn’t celebrated a win with a giant bear hug.
Every NHL player, in some way, gets to stay a kid forever. Where some people have to get up every day and sit behind a desk, these lucky few have a gift that allows them to make millions of dollars playing a game. A game. It’s not even called a job, fans don’t go watch the Sabres work against the Maple Leafs. We go see them play. You don’t go root for your financial advisor, you root for Paul Gaustad every time you watch his fist connect with an opponent, and as they fall to the ice, you jump out of your seat. The excitement, the electricity, that flows through HSBC Arena every time the Buffalo Sabres step on the ice is a phenomenon that cannot be explained in words, but every person reading this who has ever been a part of a Sabres win, whether at home or at the arena, knows the feeling I’m talking about. There is nothing quite like being one of 18,690 people, all there for one reason, and all united in their common love for hockey.
In what other city could a team sell out 49 straight games without winning the Stanley Cup? It happened here. In fact, it’s completely acceptable to us that the team hasn’t brought home a Stanley Cup yet, and last season we really didn’t play as well as we could have. But other than last season, our team has landed in the playoffs every season since the lockout, and that’s something our city can, and will, brag about.
There’s nothing quite like a Sabres fan. No one judges you for jumping on the bandwagon when we went to the playoffs, no one cares if you sit in the 300s or in a box, and it doesn’t matter what town you’ll head home to after the game. For 2 ½ hours every person in that building is equal and when Connolly nudges that overtime goal past Emery's skate, the closest person to you becomes your best friend, whether you know each other or not. You may leave never knowing your neighbor’s name, but you’ll know the way it feels to be hugged by a stranger because, my friends, there isn’t a Sabres fan around that hasn’t celebrated a win with a giant bear hug.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Lafayette Hotel, it's time for your comeback.
Thanks to Rocco Termini, the Lafayette Hotel might not be a lost cause after all. He recently bought the property, which opened in 1904, and although he isn't saying what he's doing with it quite yet, anything will be better than the waste of space it is right now. Termini has a unique talent for restoring old, seemingly decrepit buildings into gorgeous living spaces that still retain the charm and character of the building's former self. Anyone who has seen his work on other buildings in downtown Buffalo knows that he works hard to make sure the building’s character stays intact, but the building itself becomes useful again, rather than being another reminder of what Buffalo used to be. That gift for finding the balance between restoration and renovation seems to be key in making the Lafayette Hotel another building to be proud of in this city. Back in the day it was quite an impressive hotel, one of the 15 best in the country (think back to the Statler, anyone seeing a trend?) and its amenities and grandeur were certain to cement its place in history. Many of the timeless features of this hotel still stand, in terms of architecture and decor. The pillars are from its opening, the original chandeliers still hang, and the once-grand ballrooms can be restored to their original designs. While the previous owners didn't do much to keep the hotel in good shape, they did leave everything intact that it came with, which means the Lafayette Hotel still holds many of its beauties from 1904. That's a key selling point for a building that, now, is something most people haven't even heard of.
Termini plans to keep the original antiques and restore what he can of the things that need to be fixed. He wants to bring back the Lafayette Hotel of the 1900s glory days, rather than gut it and start from scratch. Calling it, "the crown jewel of downtown," it's obvious that his intentions are to bring back the pride of the hotel in its origin. As I mentioned before, he hasn’t said specifically what his plans are for the building, but he has said he’s considering restoring it as a running hotel or possibly converting the rooms to apartments. Either way, the space will become functional and attractive, rather than an unoccupied eyesore that really serves no purpose. It's refreshing to hear that someone wants to restore the things that made Buffalo what it is today, and Rocco seems to be doing all he can to revitalize our city and save our history.
Source:
http://www.buffalonews.com/cityregion/story/837702.html
Termini plans to keep the original antiques and restore what he can of the things that need to be fixed. He wants to bring back the Lafayette Hotel of the 1900s glory days, rather than gut it and start from scratch. Calling it, "the crown jewel of downtown," it's obvious that his intentions are to bring back the pride of the hotel in its origin. As I mentioned before, he hasn’t said specifically what his plans are for the building, but he has said he’s considering restoring it as a running hotel or possibly converting the rooms to apartments. Either way, the space will become functional and attractive, rather than an unoccupied eyesore that really serves no purpose. It's refreshing to hear that someone wants to restore the things that made Buffalo what it is today, and Rocco seems to be doing all he can to revitalize our city and save our history.
Source:
http://www.buffalonews.com/cityregion/story/837702.html
Thursday, October 15, 2009
We’re Clearly not Capable of Taking Care of Ourselves…
Last week an inmate at the Erie County Holding Center escaped, while shackled, in his cell, and behind a protective barrier, out onto the roof where he smiled and waved to cameras as the officers tried desperately to get him back into custody. Brian Collins rigged his cell door, learned the guards’ routine, and timed it perfectly. He even took a radio and used it to tell guards to open doors, and they had no idea they were talking to an escaped prisoner. It took two months to plan, and the whole point wasn’t even to escape, it was to do exactly what he did- cause a spectacle and make fools of the people who are supposed to be keeping us safe. Only in Buffalo do we have prisoners trying to get on the roof rather than flee the building. Thanks, we’d much rather look like asses while you’re all over our TVs than search the city for you.
Because that wasn’t enough of a spectacle, yesterday a 21-year-old at the Tonawanda police station maneuvered out of his handcuffs, escaped the building, and disappeared for a few hours before strolling back to the station to turn himself in. That was very considerate of him, considering no one could find him until then. How does one get out of his handcuffs? By licking them, obviously. Derek Schlifke licked his wrists and then slid his cuffs right off and walked out the door. It took an hour to realize he was missing, and four hours later he came back.
If you’re keeping count, that’s twice in two weeks that prisoners have gotten out of different jails in the area just to prove they could do it. That’s not good. Especially when you think back to the whole Bucky Phillips fiasco, which was far more dangerous and lasted for months before he decided to stop playing games with troopers and show himself. I know these places weren’t built to be Alcatraz, and even that had one or two jailbreaks, but this is ridiculous. I feel like these people are being put in Monopoly jail or something- you get arrested, go to jail, then take your turn rolling dice until you get doubles, then you’re free! How does this happen, and why is it always here? Buffalo needs a babysitter or something to make sure we don’t hurt ourselves because we obviously aren’t old enough to take care of ourselves.
Original sources:
http://www.wgrz.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=70829&catid=13
http://www.wgrz.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=71032&catid=37
Because that wasn’t enough of a spectacle, yesterday a 21-year-old at the Tonawanda police station maneuvered out of his handcuffs, escaped the building, and disappeared for a few hours before strolling back to the station to turn himself in. That was very considerate of him, considering no one could find him until then. How does one get out of his handcuffs? By licking them, obviously. Derek Schlifke licked his wrists and then slid his cuffs right off and walked out the door. It took an hour to realize he was missing, and four hours later he came back.
If you’re keeping count, that’s twice in two weeks that prisoners have gotten out of different jails in the area just to prove they could do it. That’s not good. Especially when you think back to the whole Bucky Phillips fiasco, which was far more dangerous and lasted for months before he decided to stop playing games with troopers and show himself. I know these places weren’t built to be Alcatraz, and even that had one or two jailbreaks, but this is ridiculous. I feel like these people are being put in Monopoly jail or something- you get arrested, go to jail, then take your turn rolling dice until you get doubles, then you’re free! How does this happen, and why is it always here? Buffalo needs a babysitter or something to make sure we don’t hurt ourselves because we obviously aren’t old enough to take care of ourselves.
Original sources:
http://www.wgrz.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=70829&catid=13
http://www.wgrz.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=71032&catid=37
The Eternal Optimist
It would appear as though my opinion of the Bills has upset one of their loyal fans. Thank you to that fan for being a perfect example of that blind faith I talked about, and I’m going to post his comment verbatim (from the Facebook fan page) and leave it to the readers to respond…
"I love Buffalo, and do not think I would want to live anywhere else. You are totally correct that there is more to Buffalo than our sports teams. However, it is those teams that joins us together...when they win, the area is electric, with a buzz in the air. When then lose, it is so depressed. But, after a loss, I avoid local radio and the ... Read Morenewspaper because the so-called voices of Buffalo just pile on and make it worse. This blog does that same thing. Being a Buffalonian means being an eternal optimist, always looking for that glimmer hope. Yes, the Bills are 1-4...at rock bottom. The division leader is 3-2. A few simple changes and that can change. Use this forum to be a positive voice, not the same old negativity we are already exposed to."
"I love Buffalo, and do not think I would want to live anywhere else. You are totally correct that there is more to Buffalo than our sports teams. However, it is those teams that joins us together...when they win, the area is electric, with a buzz in the air. When then lose, it is so depressed. But, after a loss, I avoid local radio and the ... Read Morenewspaper because the so-called voices of Buffalo just pile on and make it worse. This blog does that same thing. Being a Buffalonian means being an eternal optimist, always looking for that glimmer hope. Yes, the Bills are 1-4...at rock bottom. The division leader is 3-2. A few simple changes and that can change. Use this forum to be a positive voice, not the same old negativity we are already exposed to."
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
The Buffalo Bills should be grateful for blind faith.
If you're born and raised in Buffalo, it’s hard not to form some kind of attachment to our sports teams. Not everyone is a die-hard fan, follows them regularly, or even watches the games, and some people are entirely detached from our sports. But, every single Buffalonian shares one thing no matter how detached they may be- everyone feels that same sense of pride, that same spark in their heart, when the teams do something to be proud of. That something doesn’t have to be season-changing or highlight-reel worthy, it can even be a loss if the team fought hard and showed an effort to win. We’re all about the effort here. Fans are pretty happy as long as we aren’t embarrassed to be rooting for them. It really takes a lot to discourage a Buffalo fan. We suffer from “blind faith syndrome” like no other city.
The Bills, overall, tend to be more embarrassing than the Sabres for the always-loyal fans. Anyone who knows anything about sports knows how terrible the team is this year, and that’s with the addition of “superstar” Terrell Owens. Silly athlete, making fans believe the Bills were going to blow everyone out of the water. Don’t you know that we never win? You won’t change the Bills, they will change you. Has the team gotten any better since you joined us? No. Have you been playing like the all-star you used to be? Nope. You came to Buffalo, and now you suck. That’s just how things go here. Every season you hear Bills fans shouting from the roof that this is the year we’re going to make it. It’s funny, but also so sad.
Last year at least the fans had a reason to celebrate for a few weeks; the Bills went 5-1 at the start. They tricked their fans into thinking they were really going to prove themselves as a team to be taken seriously. Fans loved it. Super Bowl talk was everywhere, everyone bragged about players’ stats, and Ralph Wilson stadium was alive with pure pride and love. Then they lost their next 4 games, and everyone shut up. People were so shocked that the team just fell apart after such an unbelievable start.
My question is, why? Why were people so shocked that the Bills didn’t make it? They never do. They disappoint every single season and fans never seem to figure it out. Maybe it’s the city, maybe Buffalo is just not meant to be a championship city. I really hope that’s not the case but at the same time I was under the impression that our NFL team was made up of professional athletes, not local high school kids picked from a lottery. Which is what we looked like these last two weeks when we got beaten by teams that were winless before they played us. Because the Bills suck, Buffalonians are putting up one hell of a fight to try and get the coach fired. This whole thing can’t possibly be his fault, can it? For a Bills fan, it most certainly is his fault. Even though he’s not on the field playing, and he doesn’t actually control the players like they’re little puppets, it’s entirely his fault. It’s not our shitty, inexperienced quarterback or our offensive line that can’t protect the newbie. I get the whole coach-firing thing in the grand scheme of things, because the Bills have consistently failed under his control. But seriously, our disastrous season is entirely his fault? Thank you blind faith, for letting Buffalo leave the rose-colored glasses on. Our players aren’t bad, and we would never blame them for poor coaching. Like I said, they all go out there and play, and we’re all about the effort here. Take a step back and look around, our team has been a joke since long before Dick Jauron. So the question has to be asked, who’s really to blame?
The Bills, overall, tend to be more embarrassing than the Sabres for the always-loyal fans. Anyone who knows anything about sports knows how terrible the team is this year, and that’s with the addition of “superstar” Terrell Owens. Silly athlete, making fans believe the Bills were going to blow everyone out of the water. Don’t you know that we never win? You won’t change the Bills, they will change you. Has the team gotten any better since you joined us? No. Have you been playing like the all-star you used to be? Nope. You came to Buffalo, and now you suck. That’s just how things go here. Every season you hear Bills fans shouting from the roof that this is the year we’re going to make it. It’s funny, but also so sad.
Last year at least the fans had a reason to celebrate for a few weeks; the Bills went 5-1 at the start. They tricked their fans into thinking they were really going to prove themselves as a team to be taken seriously. Fans loved it. Super Bowl talk was everywhere, everyone bragged about players’ stats, and Ralph Wilson stadium was alive with pure pride and love. Then they lost their next 4 games, and everyone shut up. People were so shocked that the team just fell apart after such an unbelievable start.
My question is, why? Why were people so shocked that the Bills didn’t make it? They never do. They disappoint every single season and fans never seem to figure it out. Maybe it’s the city, maybe Buffalo is just not meant to be a championship city. I really hope that’s not the case but at the same time I was under the impression that our NFL team was made up of professional athletes, not local high school kids picked from a lottery. Which is what we looked like these last two weeks when we got beaten by teams that were winless before they played us. Because the Bills suck, Buffalonians are putting up one hell of a fight to try and get the coach fired. This whole thing can’t possibly be his fault, can it? For a Bills fan, it most certainly is his fault. Even though he’s not on the field playing, and he doesn’t actually control the players like they’re little puppets, it’s entirely his fault. It’s not our shitty, inexperienced quarterback or our offensive line that can’t protect the newbie. I get the whole coach-firing thing in the grand scheme of things, because the Bills have consistently failed under his control. But seriously, our disastrous season is entirely his fault? Thank you blind faith, for letting Buffalo leave the rose-colored glasses on. Our players aren’t bad, and we would never blame them for poor coaching. Like I said, they all go out there and play, and we’re all about the effort here. Take a step back and look around, our team has been a joke since long before Dick Jauron. So the question has to be asked, who’s really to blame?
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
The Lafayette Hotel- Once classy, turned trashy.
The Lafayette Hotel in downtown Buffalo used to be one of the 15 greatest hotels in the country. Even though that was roughly a century ago, Buffalonians can still be proud, right? The architecture remains intact, the artwork is still breathtaking, and the manager is rumored to be a registered sex offender. If that's not enough to make your stay enjoyable, you can just rent a room by the hour if you happen to be passing through. For some people, that's quite the draw. Did I mention that the other rooms are rented as apartments to other sex offenders? The manager may be a rumor, but that is an absolute fact. Check out the sex registry, you'll see the eligible bachelors all have have addresses listed, many of which are at the one and only Lafayette Hotel.
Now I know there's really plenty already to boast about with this beautiful blemish on our city, but the list of benefits to this hotel isn't over quite yet. Thanks to the Buffalo News, it's time to learn about Mr. Efrain Rosado, a resident of this building and, if I do say so, the most patient drug addict I've ever heard of. It would appear that he decided, after lighting his crack pipe, that he didn't want to smoke it at 9:30 am. So he did what any practical man would do and stored it in his shirt pocket, where it wouldn't get lost. Only one problem- it was a LIT CRACK PIPE. So, what could have been good planning for the future ended up being more harm than good. See, he lit his shirt on fire when he put the crack pipe (did I mention it was lit?) in his pocket. I guess no one taught him to stop, drop, and roll, because he put his shirt in the garbage can, which then also caught fire. This gave the Buffalo Fire Dept. something to do for the morning but I think they're already fairly busy, what with all the arson. At the end of the day he got arrested on several charges, none of which involved the crack that started the fire. I don't get that part but that's only one of the questions raised. Why would he light a crack pipe, and then not smoke it? Saving it for later really works better if you don't light it, and since when are drug addicts fans of postponing gratification? They really strike me as the instant-gratification type, but I'm not a drug addict so who knows? Thank you Buffalo News, for giving me something to wonder about. Maybe if every crack addict decided to save their drugs for later, the drug problem would go away. Maybe this guy could start working for DARE, helping kids everywhere to properly store their crack.
http://www.buffalonews.com/437/story/819198.html
Now I know there's really plenty already to boast about with this beautiful blemish on our city, but the list of benefits to this hotel isn't over quite yet. Thanks to the Buffalo News, it's time to learn about Mr. Efrain Rosado, a resident of this building and, if I do say so, the most patient drug addict I've ever heard of. It would appear that he decided, after lighting his crack pipe, that he didn't want to smoke it at 9:30 am. So he did what any practical man would do and stored it in his shirt pocket, where it wouldn't get lost. Only one problem- it was a LIT CRACK PIPE. So, what could have been good planning for the future ended up being more harm than good. See, he lit his shirt on fire when he put the crack pipe (did I mention it was lit?) in his pocket. I guess no one taught him to stop, drop, and roll, because he put his shirt in the garbage can, which then also caught fire. This gave the Buffalo Fire Dept. something to do for the morning but I think they're already fairly busy, what with all the arson. At the end of the day he got arrested on several charges, none of which involved the crack that started the fire. I don't get that part but that's only one of the questions raised. Why would he light a crack pipe, and then not smoke it? Saving it for later really works better if you don't light it, and since when are drug addicts fans of postponing gratification? They really strike me as the instant-gratification type, but I'm not a drug addict so who knows? Thank you Buffalo News, for giving me something to wonder about. Maybe if every crack addict decided to save their drugs for later, the drug problem would go away. Maybe this guy could start working for DARE, helping kids everywhere to properly store their crack.
http://www.buffalonews.com/437/story/819198.html
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Google is helping to misrepresent Buffalo..
Never Google "things to do in Buffalo" or you’ll end up following the advice of an outsider on what the “Best Bars” are, and even better, what they have that is special enough to put them on that list. I don’t know when this grossly inaccurate list was concocted, or what individual at 10best.com had the honor of creating it, but I’m taking it upon myself to correct it before more people hate our city.
“Best Bars”- according to someone who doesn’t even bother to make it to ten for a website called “10best.com”
1. Eddie Brady’s
2. Club Diablo
3. Club Marcella
4. 67 West
5. Buffalo Brewpub
6. Swiston’s Beef & Keg
7. Left Bank
8. Bar-Bill Tavern
9. Mohawk Place
There’s a second list, entitled “10 Best Buffalo Nightlife” but I’ll address that in a different post. One disaster at a time, please. Whoever came up with this list was clearly a lazy jackass who never bothered to actually research Buffalo. Not that I’m surprised, because given our reputation why would anyone bother, but if you’re going to talk about our bars, that’s one thing we can give pretty good advice on. But no, instead you Googled Buffalo bars and combined their results to make a “great list.” You loved it, your editor loved it, next thing you know it’s out there for the world to see. You didn’t do the worst possible job, some of the bars are a legitimate good time and could be contenders… sort of. For the most part you blew it and there’s one problem with that mistake- every once and awhile someone from Buffalo stumbles across one of these and decides to make you look like an idiot.
I may as well start at the beginning- Eddie Brady’s is the best bar in Buffalo?! Maybe 10 years ago when I was too young to go experience the wonder that is the best bar in Buffalo, but now putting it at #1 is almost a slap in the face. Eddie Brady’s may not be the worst bar in Buffalo, but they’ve definitely peaked, long before this article was written. The Eddie Brady’s I know is a mix between uber-cool 17 year olds and middle-aged men who try and fuck them. Ok, so you pretty much have that at any bar here, I admit it. But most bars don’t have a rapist’s wet dream for a surrounding neighborhood. On either side of the bar is an abandoned warehouse, ripe for the picking when one of the homeless men living across the street decides to wander over and “play” with the kiddies. Oh yeah, there’s a group of homeless people living in the abandoned store front across from the bar.
If Club Diablo is the second-best bar in Buffalo, our city’s interests are far more subversive than I thought. I don’t know how this writer decided on Club Diablo but the description they give is hysterical- awesome dance nights, alternative music, great drinks. That’s all fine and good but they failed to mention the hardcore biker groups that hang out there, and that Club Diablo proudly hosted Buffalo’s first fetish party. Not to worry, if you missed it, they have more than one sex-themed show a year. I happen to be in the age group that spends a lot of time in bars and I can tell you that no one I know has ever gone to Club Diablo because, frankly, it looks fucking terrifying. From the outside it looks like the entrance to Satan’s private lair, and that’s not exactly what I’d consider #2 best bar material.
Club Marcella came in at #3 and while I wouldn’t have put it quite that high, their Googling served them well. It’s the closest they’ve come to finding a bar worth labeling as one of our best. They described the bar pretty well and it is a fun place to be. It’s Buffalo’s premiere gay bar and it’s always busy with good music and good drinks. Not to mention they put on a hell of a drag show.
At #4, 67 West is another one that wasn’t a bad choice. It’s in the right location in the heart of Chippewa, drinks are cheap, and it’s always packed to the walls with people. But no matter how packed it gets, it’s always a good time. They do call it “unpretentious” though and I’d have to disagree with that. Swarmed by better-than-you private school kids who first hang out there and then bartend there, pretention can definitely run high on certain nights.
Buffalo Brew Pub is #5 and this is an interesting choice. I’m torn because the location is not at all where a good bar would be, but they have endless beer selections, throw fun Oktoberfest parties, and really know how to drink. I guess on the basis of a bar alone, they can stay on the list.
Swiston’s Beef & Keg is #6 on the list, and all I can say is, huh? This restaurant is known for delicious beef on weck sandwiches, not their bar service. To make matters even worse, it’s in Tonawanda. No one would put a bar that far away on their 9 best list, it’s just not close enough to where the majority of the worthwhile bars are.
The Left Bank is #7. They have delicious dinners but I have never heard of people going there as a bar. Maybe dinner and drinks? But that’s more like cocktails, not what you envision when you think of one of the best bars in Buffalo. The semi-formal atmosphere is not very laid-back even during dinner, and the fact that it sits in a horrible area of the city is just one more reason to take it off the list.
#8 is Bar-Bill Tavern in East Aurora. Which is roughly 25 minutes from downtown Buffalo, where any of the bars on the list worth going to are located. It’s a back-in-the-woods restaurant that my friends’ parents go to for a 4 o’ clock happy hour. It’s not even really in Buffalo, and by a Buffalonian’s standards would never fall under the best bars in Buffalo. Best in the Southtowns? Who knows. But not Buffalo.
Rounding out the list at #9 (they were too lazy to find one more, remember?) is Mohawk Place. They tout the exciting list of bands that come to play there as enticement to go see the bar. Ironically, a bar is never mentioned. Just the music and the bands. Hmm.. Am I missing something? Yeah, Mohawk Place has cool concerts, but I thought this was a list about bars. If not the title of the list is very misleading. Not to mention the majority of the patrons of Mohawk Place nowadays are grungy emo teenagers all angry over nothing.
I really wish I could give these people credit for trying or effort but really, your list sucked. It was half-assed, poorly researched, and by no means showcases Buffalo’s best bars. We’re a city that’s proud of our drinking, and we take things like that very seriously. Next time, poorly represent a city that doesn’t spend so much time drinking and maybe it will go unnoticed.
"Best Bars" list came from http://www.10best.com/Buffalo,NY/Nightlife/Bars/
“Best Bars”- according to someone who doesn’t even bother to make it to ten for a website called “10best.com”
1. Eddie Brady’s
2. Club Diablo
3. Club Marcella
4. 67 West
5. Buffalo Brewpub
6. Swiston’s Beef & Keg
7. Left Bank
8. Bar-Bill Tavern
9. Mohawk Place
There’s a second list, entitled “10 Best Buffalo Nightlife” but I’ll address that in a different post. One disaster at a time, please. Whoever came up with this list was clearly a lazy jackass who never bothered to actually research Buffalo. Not that I’m surprised, because given our reputation why would anyone bother, but if you’re going to talk about our bars, that’s one thing we can give pretty good advice on. But no, instead you Googled Buffalo bars and combined their results to make a “great list.” You loved it, your editor loved it, next thing you know it’s out there for the world to see. You didn’t do the worst possible job, some of the bars are a legitimate good time and could be contenders… sort of. For the most part you blew it and there’s one problem with that mistake- every once and awhile someone from Buffalo stumbles across one of these and decides to make you look like an idiot.
I may as well start at the beginning- Eddie Brady’s is the best bar in Buffalo?! Maybe 10 years ago when I was too young to go experience the wonder that is the best bar in Buffalo, but now putting it at #1 is almost a slap in the face. Eddie Brady’s may not be the worst bar in Buffalo, but they’ve definitely peaked, long before this article was written. The Eddie Brady’s I know is a mix between uber-cool 17 year olds and middle-aged men who try and fuck them. Ok, so you pretty much have that at any bar here, I admit it. But most bars don’t have a rapist’s wet dream for a surrounding neighborhood. On either side of the bar is an abandoned warehouse, ripe for the picking when one of the homeless men living across the street decides to wander over and “play” with the kiddies. Oh yeah, there’s a group of homeless people living in the abandoned store front across from the bar.
If Club Diablo is the second-best bar in Buffalo, our city’s interests are far more subversive than I thought. I don’t know how this writer decided on Club Diablo but the description they give is hysterical- awesome dance nights, alternative music, great drinks. That’s all fine and good but they failed to mention the hardcore biker groups that hang out there, and that Club Diablo proudly hosted Buffalo’s first fetish party. Not to worry, if you missed it, they have more than one sex-themed show a year. I happen to be in the age group that spends a lot of time in bars and I can tell you that no one I know has ever gone to Club Diablo because, frankly, it looks fucking terrifying. From the outside it looks like the entrance to Satan’s private lair, and that’s not exactly what I’d consider #2 best bar material.
Club Marcella came in at #3 and while I wouldn’t have put it quite that high, their Googling served them well. It’s the closest they’ve come to finding a bar worth labeling as one of our best. They described the bar pretty well and it is a fun place to be. It’s Buffalo’s premiere gay bar and it’s always busy with good music and good drinks. Not to mention they put on a hell of a drag show.
At #4, 67 West is another one that wasn’t a bad choice. It’s in the right location in the heart of Chippewa, drinks are cheap, and it’s always packed to the walls with people. But no matter how packed it gets, it’s always a good time. They do call it “unpretentious” though and I’d have to disagree with that. Swarmed by better-than-you private school kids who first hang out there and then bartend there, pretention can definitely run high on certain nights.
Buffalo Brew Pub is #5 and this is an interesting choice. I’m torn because the location is not at all where a good bar would be, but they have endless beer selections, throw fun Oktoberfest parties, and really know how to drink. I guess on the basis of a bar alone, they can stay on the list.
Swiston’s Beef & Keg is #6 on the list, and all I can say is, huh? This restaurant is known for delicious beef on weck sandwiches, not their bar service. To make matters even worse, it’s in Tonawanda. No one would put a bar that far away on their 9 best list, it’s just not close enough to where the majority of the worthwhile bars are.
The Left Bank is #7. They have delicious dinners but I have never heard of people going there as a bar. Maybe dinner and drinks? But that’s more like cocktails, not what you envision when you think of one of the best bars in Buffalo. The semi-formal atmosphere is not very laid-back even during dinner, and the fact that it sits in a horrible area of the city is just one more reason to take it off the list.
#8 is Bar-Bill Tavern in East Aurora. Which is roughly 25 minutes from downtown Buffalo, where any of the bars on the list worth going to are located. It’s a back-in-the-woods restaurant that my friends’ parents go to for a 4 o’ clock happy hour. It’s not even really in Buffalo, and by a Buffalonian’s standards would never fall under the best bars in Buffalo. Best in the Southtowns? Who knows. But not Buffalo.
Rounding out the list at #9 (they were too lazy to find one more, remember?) is Mohawk Place. They tout the exciting list of bands that come to play there as enticement to go see the bar. Ironically, a bar is never mentioned. Just the music and the bands. Hmm.. Am I missing something? Yeah, Mohawk Place has cool concerts, but I thought this was a list about bars. If not the title of the list is very misleading. Not to mention the majority of the patrons of Mohawk Place nowadays are grungy emo teenagers all angry over nothing.
I really wish I could give these people credit for trying or effort but really, your list sucked. It was half-assed, poorly researched, and by no means showcases Buffalo’s best bars. We’re a city that’s proud of our drinking, and we take things like that very seriously. Next time, poorly represent a city that doesn’t spend so much time drinking and maybe it will go unnoticed.
"Best Bars" list came from http://www.10best.com/Buffalo,NY/Nightlife/Bars/
Monday, September 28, 2009
Secrets of Living in Buffalo- things you’d probably never know if you didn’t live here.
1- The only mall worth going to is the Galleria, but there are actually 3 others in the area.
2- There are actual buffalo in Delaware Park.
3- We have 4 distinct seasons- winter gets into the negatives, summer can be 100 degrees, and fall and spring actually exist. Leaves turn in the fall, April showers come in spring, the whole she-bang.
4- Everyone gets excited the first time it snows.
5- We don’t always have snow on Christmas. In fact, it’s a nice surprise if we do.
6- No one bothers with the few strip clubs here, the Canadian ballet is only 20 minutes away and you get to see a lot more.
7- It’s always confusing when a Buffalonian goes to a zoo in another city and sees people taking pictures of Canadian geese in an exhibit. They just wander around here. So do turkeys.
8- Buffalo is 9 hours from Manhattan. We’re not next-door neighbors and no one ever goes there for the hell of it. Stop asking.
9- General Mills’ factory is here and the city always smells like Cheerios when you drive down the 190. It’s delicious.
10- Chicken wings are one of the easiest recipes to replicate, and no other city can seem to manage it. Stop making it so complicated and maybe we’ll start eating them in other cities.
11- Anchorbar is not the best place to get wings. Even though it’s famous and the “birthplace of wings,” Duff’s is better.
12- Buffalo’s nickname “the Queen City” is actually in reference to Chicago being the King City, not New York.
13- It is common, and perfectly acceptable, to live with your parents into your mid twenties.
14- Seeing Niagara Falls is not worth a honeymoon to Buffalo. Yes, they’re amazing. No, there’s not much else to do once you’ve seen them.
15- As long as you stay in the city you’re pretty safe from traffic tickets,speeding tickets, etc. step into the suburbs, where outsiders are frowned upon, and you’ll get a ticket before you even know your phone has rung.
16- We have the best late night food ever. Period.
2- There are actual buffalo in Delaware Park.
3- We have 4 distinct seasons- winter gets into the negatives, summer can be 100 degrees, and fall and spring actually exist. Leaves turn in the fall, April showers come in spring, the whole she-bang.
4- Everyone gets excited the first time it snows.
5- We don’t always have snow on Christmas. In fact, it’s a nice surprise if we do.
6- No one bothers with the few strip clubs here, the Canadian ballet is only 20 minutes away and you get to see a lot more.
7- It’s always confusing when a Buffalonian goes to a zoo in another city and sees people taking pictures of Canadian geese in an exhibit. They just wander around here. So do turkeys.
8- Buffalo is 9 hours from Manhattan. We’re not next-door neighbors and no one ever goes there for the hell of it. Stop asking.
9- General Mills’ factory is here and the city always smells like Cheerios when you drive down the 190. It’s delicious.
10- Chicken wings are one of the easiest recipes to replicate, and no other city can seem to manage it. Stop making it so complicated and maybe we’ll start eating them in other cities.
11- Anchorbar is not the best place to get wings. Even though it’s famous and the “birthplace of wings,” Duff’s is better.
12- Buffalo’s nickname “the Queen City” is actually in reference to Chicago being the King City, not New York.
13- It is common, and perfectly acceptable, to live with your parents into your mid twenties.
14- Seeing Niagara Falls is not worth a honeymoon to Buffalo. Yes, they’re amazing. No, there’s not much else to do once you’ve seen them.
15- As long as you stay in the city you’re pretty safe from traffic tickets,speeding tickets, etc. step into the suburbs, where outsiders are frowned upon, and you’ll get a ticket before you even know your phone has rung.
16- We have the best late night food ever. Period.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Childhood advice is ruining our generation.
Growing up, there was one common piece of advice that every child heard—you can be anything you want to be when you grow up. That’s great advice for the 6 year old who wants to be a space cowboy, but at some point you have to accept that it’s not entirely true. Okay, you can bust your ass and become successful in most careers but there are just some things not everyone can do. The 30-year-old cart-pushing drummer is probably always going to remain the former. Unless he’s struck by a bolt of lucky lightning (which I think has happened maybe twice in history), chances are he wasn’t meant to be a rock star. Regarding the 25-year-old “actress” working in the local theater? Feel free to either move to Hollywood, where you’ll get a big fat reality check, or give up, move out of your parent’s house, and try something else. There’s probably something average that you’re decent at but haven’t ever put in the effort because you wanted to be famous.
This doesn’t just apply to embarrassing wannabes, either. It goes for everyone who will end up a failure because they’re dedicating their lives to something they’ll probably never achieve. The kid growing up who couldn’t figure out the difference between chemistry and physics is not going to make a good doctor. And there will be plenty of evidence of this along the way, believe me. Med schools will deny you, you’ll get turned down for internships, and seriously, you should take a hint. But no, instead you go to school in the Bahamas, or Aruba, or some other obscure place that will eventually give you a degree that will allow you to practice medicine on actual people. Am I the only one who’s disturbed by that? To me that’s like having my mother type up a pretty certificate on Word and handing it to me with the advice from childhood- “here’s your support, go be what you want to be!”
What I’m getting at here is that a disturbing number of people carried that childhood advice into adulthood and it’s not doing anyone any good. At some point in your life you have to accept that your parents were just trying to encourage a child’s active mind, not give you a life lesson that will end up lowering the standards of every professional career. Those standards are there for a reason and there are millions of jobs that people who don’t meet those standards can do instead. It’s okay to strive to be very successful at an everyday job. Not everyone has to be a rocket scientist, or a brain surgeon, so please, stop trying if you’re no good. Let it go, appreciate your parents’ advice, but stop following it to the letter. It’s embarrassing for you and everyone who watches you waste your time failing, including your parents.
This doesn’t just apply to embarrassing wannabes, either. It goes for everyone who will end up a failure because they’re dedicating their lives to something they’ll probably never achieve. The kid growing up who couldn’t figure out the difference between chemistry and physics is not going to make a good doctor. And there will be plenty of evidence of this along the way, believe me. Med schools will deny you, you’ll get turned down for internships, and seriously, you should take a hint. But no, instead you go to school in the Bahamas, or Aruba, or some other obscure place that will eventually give you a degree that will allow you to practice medicine on actual people. Am I the only one who’s disturbed by that? To me that’s like having my mother type up a pretty certificate on Word and handing it to me with the advice from childhood- “here’s your support, go be what you want to be!”
What I’m getting at here is that a disturbing number of people carried that childhood advice into adulthood and it’s not doing anyone any good. At some point in your life you have to accept that your parents were just trying to encourage a child’s active mind, not give you a life lesson that will end up lowering the standards of every professional career. Those standards are there for a reason and there are millions of jobs that people who don’t meet those standards can do instead. It’s okay to strive to be very successful at an everyday job. Not everyone has to be a rocket scientist, or a brain surgeon, so please, stop trying if you’re no good. Let it go, appreciate your parents’ advice, but stop following it to the letter. It’s embarrassing for you and everyone who watches you waste your time failing, including your parents.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
The Chickens have flown the coop....
And they've landed directly in downtown Buffalo. In case you haven't heard, as of a few months ago, people are allowed to keep chickens on their property. IN THE CITY. Now I can appreciate the pleasure of having fresh eggs for breakfast, but not in the middle of Manhattan. How often do you see chickens squawking out the window on 5th avenue? Never. And that's not because New Yorkers don't love eggs. It's because it is completely inappropriate to have a chicken coop in a city. The whole concept is absurd! Where would you keep them? Your back porch? How will they get the proper care in a small, cramped, city yard? Why do you want chickens in the city to begin with? Those are two totally different lifestyles that just do not mesh.
To its credit, Buffalo officials did impose guidelines. Useless, retarded, vague guidelines, but I can't just ignore the fact that they exist. By the way, it's embarrassing that these are the kinds of things I have to give Buffalo officials credit for. In case you're curious, there will be no roosters permitted, and no more than 5 chickens per house. Mind you, that's more than the amount of dogs you can legally have. There are other guidelines but they're not even worth mentioning, they're not amusing or purposeful. The chickens were banned in the first place because of health concerns and chicken fights. Health concerns, you say? I guess they're not a concern anymore. Maybe the chickens got vaccinated before they moved in. Chicken fights aren't really my area of knowledge but I'm willing to bet that if the police can't get a handle on dog fights and mistreatment of normal pets, they're probably not too up on the local chicken fighting. Not to mention, chickens are loud. And dirty. And a redneck trademark. Go to Springville, there's plenty of evidence down there for who should be owning and raising chickens.
On a more serious note, there are plenty of suburbs around Buffalo where you could happily raise chickens in a much more comfortable, well-suited environment. The houses aren't 5 feet away from each other, your chickens don't run the risk of being involved in a drive-by, and you (the redneck who owns them) will be much more comfortable where you can ride your John Deere all the way to the barn, instead of just to the back porch.
To its credit, Buffalo officials did impose guidelines. Useless, retarded, vague guidelines, but I can't just ignore the fact that they exist. By the way, it's embarrassing that these are the kinds of things I have to give Buffalo officials credit for. In case you're curious, there will be no roosters permitted, and no more than 5 chickens per house. Mind you, that's more than the amount of dogs you can legally have. There are other guidelines but they're not even worth mentioning, they're not amusing or purposeful. The chickens were banned in the first place because of health concerns and chicken fights. Health concerns, you say? I guess they're not a concern anymore. Maybe the chickens got vaccinated before they moved in. Chicken fights aren't really my area of knowledge but I'm willing to bet that if the police can't get a handle on dog fights and mistreatment of normal pets, they're probably not too up on the local chicken fighting. Not to mention, chickens are loud. And dirty. And a redneck trademark. Go to Springville, there's plenty of evidence down there for who should be owning and raising chickens.
On a more serious note, there are plenty of suburbs around Buffalo where you could happily raise chickens in a much more comfortable, well-suited environment. The houses aren't 5 feet away from each other, your chickens don't run the risk of being involved in a drive-by, and you (the redneck who owns them) will be much more comfortable where you can ride your John Deere all the way to the barn, instead of just to the back porch.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Unsolved Mysteries, Pt. One
There's a beautiful place in Buffalo known as the Walden Galleria. It's our mall and we love it. The lack of parking at any given time proves just how much people love it. P.F.Chang's is opening soon and pretty much everything else new is done. It's a little sad that everything new for us is 5 years old everywhere else but hey, I'll take what I can get. Anyways, I got sidetracked. I was originally headed in to buy one thing, and I ended up people watching instead. What is with teenagers and their ridiculous clothes? I wasn't allowed to wear that much makeup or that little clothing until I was at least 16. These girls are 14 years old, faces blacked out like Marilyn Manson, glaring at everyone like the world has done them some great injustice. That is, until their iPhones ring that their mothers are outside to pick them up. What are they so miserable about? I just don't understand that craze.
There is only one craze that baffles me more, and living so close to Canada one cannot help but see it everywhere. What is this craze? It has taken over the entire country... I know you've seen it..
Middle-aged Chinese women dressed in Forever 21 jeans, a sparkly halter top that absolutely shows an inch of midriff, 5 inch clear heels, and some gaudy bag. Not to mention, she's usually out with her family who finds nothing wrong with her matching her 12 year old daughter. When did this become okay? Where did they get the idea that "juniors" meant married with children? I guess it's just one of life's great mysteries, never to be solved..
There is only one craze that baffles me more, and living so close to Canada one cannot help but see it everywhere. What is this craze? It has taken over the entire country... I know you've seen it..
Middle-aged Chinese women dressed in Forever 21 jeans, a sparkly halter top that absolutely shows an inch of midriff, 5 inch clear heels, and some gaudy bag. Not to mention, she's usually out with her family who finds nothing wrong with her matching her 12 year old daughter. When did this become okay? Where did they get the idea that "juniors" meant married with children? I guess it's just one of life's great mysteries, never to be solved..
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Where to start with Buffalo?
I guess this is the perfect time to write about Buffalo, what with our promising football season underway, hockey on the cusp, and any semblance of good weather completely gone. But, what might sound awful to some people, for the residents of Buffalo, now is the time to get excited! Our football season started Monday night with a heartbreaking loss to the Pats. Are you surprised? I wasn't. As much as I love everything Buffalo, disappointment is a common trend in those we look up to. The Bills tried their hardest and I can promise next week's game will be watched by the same hopeful, if somewhat naive, fans. That's the beauty of this city, nothing gets us down. We can lose and lose and lose and still watch every week. Who wouldn't love that? Dedicated fans can, however, have their flaws. A few overly sensitive fans decided to trash the lawn of the player at fault and that's unfortunate. Do you honestly think you could have done better? I'm betting he probably had some experience in that situation and made his best attempt, unless he's out to sabotage our team. That must be it! McKelvin WANTS the Bills to lose. He held that ball, thought long and hard, and found the play that would surely promise a loss. But the worst part of all is that it was a group of kids. Where do you learn that those things are okay?
I never wonder how Buffalo gets its reputation or why people apologize when I say it's my hometown. Almost everything people think about our city is true, it's just not all we have to offer. In writing this, I hope to at least open people's eyes to the rest of Buffalo, both good and bad. And, as any Buffalonian knows, there are plenty of local things that no one ever hears about that are even more entertaining than the few things that make national news. Consider me an observer of all things Buffalo, providing you with an inside view of what goes on in this one-of-a-kind city.
I never wonder how Buffalo gets its reputation or why people apologize when I say it's my hometown. Almost everything people think about our city is true, it's just not all we have to offer. In writing this, I hope to at least open people's eyes to the rest of Buffalo, both good and bad. And, as any Buffalonian knows, there are plenty of local things that no one ever hears about that are even more entertaining than the few things that make national news. Consider me an observer of all things Buffalo, providing you with an inside view of what goes on in this one-of-a-kind city.
College advice that everyone else is too polite to give..
Since a degree is fairly useful in finding a decent job, I'm putting in my time at one of our local colleges. What college it is doesn't matter, all that matters is the humor I get out of the people I see on a daily basis. Most people probably wouldn't think to put these things out in the open, but after 4+ years of college, I need to try and help these people. Because being a student gives me the opportunity to observe the same large group of people for a good period of time, I've learned to observe and comment on their behavior. So, based on my findings, I've developed a short list of tips to help make the experience more enjoyable for everyone-
1- Dry cereal is never an acceptable food to eat during a class. I don't care if it's 8am and you just finished a Master Cleanse, the last thing anyone else wants to do is listen to you chew. If you must eat, at least have the courtesy to find something that doesn't sound like bones breaking. A banana is soft, chewy, and just as healthy! You'll be full and no one will hate you for chomping in their ears. And believe me, it resonates from one side of the classroom to the other.
2- If you're going to be late to class, at least leave the evidence in the car. Strolling in 15 minutes late with Starbucks in your hand annoys everyone. It makes it embarrassingly obvious to everyone why you were late and it disrespects the teacher. Everyone runs late, it happens. If you're late because of something stupid and obvious, don't show it off to everyone. It just makes you look dumb.
3-Showing up to a morning class in sweats, flip flops, and 10 lbs of makeup is not cute. No one looks at you and thinks, "Wow! That girl is HOT!" Everyone looking at you is wondering why you are wearing so much makeup so early. Every girl in the room knows how long it took you, and it is not okay. If you want to get dressed up, go ahead! Just don't half-ass it or you look like a morning-after work hooker.
4- Wearing heels that you clearly are not comfortable in is almost as bad as makeup and sweats. Everyone watching you wobble down the hallway, or worse, the 5 flights of stairs, is concerned not only for your safety but your sanity as well. If you loved heels, you'd be better at walking in them. And I can promise there is no reason to wear them everyday (which some weeble wobbles do). If you have to work after class, throw flip flops in your bag. It looks much better to be in dress pants and flips flops, smoothly weaving through the halls, than to be stumbling through people focusing all your energy on balance. Trust me, I'm not the only one waiting for you to faceplant. Let's face it, you probably deserve to.
6-Very simple- girls only (usually). Do not flip your hair back so it sits on the desk behind you. That desk is someone else's space and your hair is gross to that person. Unless you accept that one day the person behind you may bring scissors, just don't do it.
7- Just as simple as 6, but for the guys. Keep your hands out of your pants during class. I don't care what the problem is, how bored you are, there are plenty of acceptable things to fidget with during class besides your junk. It makes people uncomfortable.
8- Lastly, one I used to hope was a rarity. Taking your shoes off in class is NEVER okay. Do you take your shoes off in a grocery store? Or at football games? No! Public places, classrooms included, are not clothing-optional. You look like white trash with no shoes and you know what? That odor is not exclusive to your nose. Everyone can smell it, and they all know it's you, Mr. No Shoes.
Obviously these are not keys to success or tricks for getting As. I just think that if people listened to these little tidbits of advice, spending the majority of your time in the classroom wouldn't be quite so painful.
1- Dry cereal is never an acceptable food to eat during a class. I don't care if it's 8am and you just finished a Master Cleanse, the last thing anyone else wants to do is listen to you chew. If you must eat, at least have the courtesy to find something that doesn't sound like bones breaking. A banana is soft, chewy, and just as healthy! You'll be full and no one will hate you for chomping in their ears. And believe me, it resonates from one side of the classroom to the other.
2- If you're going to be late to class, at least leave the evidence in the car. Strolling in 15 minutes late with Starbucks in your hand annoys everyone. It makes it embarrassingly obvious to everyone why you were late and it disrespects the teacher. Everyone runs late, it happens. If you're late because of something stupid and obvious, don't show it off to everyone. It just makes you look dumb.
3-Showing up to a morning class in sweats, flip flops, and 10 lbs of makeup is not cute. No one looks at you and thinks, "Wow! That girl is HOT!" Everyone looking at you is wondering why you are wearing so much makeup so early. Every girl in the room knows how long it took you, and it is not okay. If you want to get dressed up, go ahead! Just don't half-ass it or you look like a morning-after work hooker.
4- Wearing heels that you clearly are not comfortable in is almost as bad as makeup and sweats. Everyone watching you wobble down the hallway, or worse, the 5 flights of stairs, is concerned not only for your safety but your sanity as well. If you loved heels, you'd be better at walking in them. And I can promise there is no reason to wear them everyday (which some weeble wobbles do). If you have to work after class, throw flip flops in your bag. It looks much better to be in dress pants and flips flops, smoothly weaving through the halls, than to be stumbling through people focusing all your energy on balance. Trust me, I'm not the only one waiting for you to faceplant. Let's face it, you probably deserve to.
6-Very simple- girls only (usually). Do not flip your hair back so it sits on the desk behind you. That desk is someone else's space and your hair is gross to that person. Unless you accept that one day the person behind you may bring scissors, just don't do it.
7- Just as simple as 6, but for the guys. Keep your hands out of your pants during class. I don't care what the problem is, how bored you are, there are plenty of acceptable things to fidget with during class besides your junk. It makes people uncomfortable.
8- Lastly, one I used to hope was a rarity. Taking your shoes off in class is NEVER okay. Do you take your shoes off in a grocery store? Or at football games? No! Public places, classrooms included, are not clothing-optional. You look like white trash with no shoes and you know what? That odor is not exclusive to your nose. Everyone can smell it, and they all know it's you, Mr. No Shoes.
Obviously these are not keys to success or tricks for getting As. I just think that if people listened to these little tidbits of advice, spending the majority of your time in the classroom wouldn't be quite so painful.
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